If I invite my friends for a birthday dinner, should I pay for their meals or should they pay for themselves?

Every year when i have a birthday dinner, I usually pay for my friends meal because i feel bad not paying if I officially invited them.


I'm throwing a birthday party this year, but this time im inviting 20+ friends,should I pay for all of them again???


P.S -I'm providing the cakes and paying my meal.
If I invite my friends for a birthday dinner, should I pay for their meals or should they pay for themselves?
The general rule of thumb is the one who invites also pays. However, since they're your friends, and there are many of them, I don't see why you can't ask them to come and celebrate your birthday at Whatever Restaurant, with the stipulation that they will be responsible for their own tab.





As long as you're very clear about that up front, I don't see a problem. If they can't afford to (or would rather not) buy their own meals, tell them they're still welcome to come by for a slice of cake after dinner.
Reply:God - you're all a backward lot! I invite my friends out to a big dinner once a month, no way in heck do they expect me to pay, any more than I expect them to pay for me when they organise it. I would never expect to be paid for if I'm invited to something, that's just ridiculous and an idea that belongs in the 50s.





If you're going out to dinner you absolutely do NOT have to pay for everyone. The only problem here is that you've set a precedent of paying in the past, so you need to be quite upfront about them paying for their own meals.





On the other hand, if you're having a party at your own house, yes, you would be expected to pay for the food but where I come from just about everyone would also bring a plate so there'd be plenty to go around.
Reply:You are planning the party, so you have the luxury of planning something you can afford to host. If you can't buy a meal for 20 people, invite them for coffee or brunch or tea or etc. These days everybody is counting pennies - I would hate to decline a birthday invitation from a good friend, but if it comes with a twenty dollar price tag, I will say no. I'm OK eating cheap at home, and I can't afford a restaurant meal.
Reply:I think it depends on if it's a formal or casual thing.


If you send out invitations, do all the planning, etc., then you're responsible for paying for the food.


If it's an informal, "hey let's go out to eat this weekend, it's my birthday!" get-together, then they all pay their own way.


With my friends, the birthday girl doesn't do the planning or inviting, and we all pay for her meal.
Reply:THis entirely depends on how well off you are. If you are not a well off person and can't afford to treat your friends you should say something like this to them. "Oh by the way it's my birthday on xxxxx. A few friends and myself are going to dinner at xxxxx. Quite a lot of people will be coming this year, so I am asking people to expect to pay for their own meal which will cost about xx . We will probably just pass a hat round or something and maybe everyone could put in enough to cover their own drinks and meal."





It is very common to do this nowadays.





Make sure they let you know definitely whether they are coming or not before you make the final booking at the restaurant.
Reply:Friends only pay for your birthday if they want to give you a surprise party. If its you who is planning to have one , I think it should be proper that you shoulder all the expenses.





Other type of friends bring food with them to surprise you, God bless them but do not rely on such supply in your budget, planned for the number of heads to come after verifying if they are coming over or not.
Reply:my classmate invited me to go see a movie, i asked if she was paying and she looked at me as if i should know the answer......i had to pay. we didn't even sit next to each other since it was so packed and my mom end up having to pay for this dumb boy who was not old enough to get in by himself to see the movie "blade 2" so if you're inviting someone to a party, you supply everything.
Reply:lf you are actually having a party at your home....then you supply the food.You can supply some drinks...but if they drink alcohol then this is up to them.


When dining out at a restaurant you could upfront invite them to share your night out but l think most people would or should be prepared to pay their way.
Reply:You're having a party and you want your friends to pay for it? I don't think so. If you can't afford the number of people you invited then cut the number down. Have a "Bring a dish to pass" party at your place and share your time with your friends.
Reply:I would say that these ppl should pay for your meal since it is your birthday. If you have already set the precedent that you pay (and it sounds like you have) then you need to make it clear that they are paying for their own.
Reply:I think you should pay the meal. Even though it's a lot of people, some of the guets may get mad or say something if they have to pay themselves. I hope this helped.
Reply:Before you send the invitations, make sure to clearly write on them that the meal is self-pay so there is no misunderstanding.
Reply:You should pay for your friends, unfortunately, haha =]
Reply:Invitations denote you are the host; ergo, you pay for the guests.
Reply:if you invite..you pay
Reply:they should pay for you its your birthday